If you were like me and you were trying to travel on Dec. 23, then you were SOL. At Cleveland-Hopkins International Airport (CLE), United Airlines actually ran out of ethelyne glycol, their de-icing fluid. The highways were in such terrible condition that the transportation of chemicals such as ethelyne glycol was prohibited until the road conditions improved. This meant, of course, that United couldn't get any more de-icer. As such, over 200 flights were canceled at CLE, including my flight to Denver.

But feel sorrier for the flight that was supposed to leave at 6:20 AM yesterday morning. The plane sat outside all night and was "frozen solid" (in the words of a United ticketing agent). Passengers boarded the plane as usual, then proceeded to wait five hours. On the plane! At last they were permitted to de-plane and then got very angry when they were told the flight might not be leaving at all. One woman was out for blood, demanding that the ticketing agent get someone to the gate "immediately" who could fix her problem. As expected, the constant berating didn't get her on the flight any faster.

There are thousands of people without power in Greater Cleveland, due mostly to ice-laden trees that fell on power lines. But people in Cincinnati have gotten it worst. My friend Kathryn reports that she has received 16 inches of snow! Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky International Airport (CVG) was actually closed yesterday. All Cleveland got was bitterly cold temperatures, dropping down to 16 degrees two days ago. Would you believe that when I left Oxford last Friday, I could wear only a sweater and be fine? Seriously: the weather was great. The first time it snowed in Oxford was actually a few weeks ago, in December. Halloween was, for the first time, very temperate and didn't require a winter coat. Then Old Man Winter decided to pay us what we were owed since November in one easy installment of Sweet Sassy Crap, This Weather Is Awful.

And yet, the problems don't stop there. I wrote in November about having my name on a terrorist watchlist. You'd think that after a while, a name as common as "Mark Wilson" would be removed. But you'd be wrong. I was again prevented from self-checking-in at CLE; the computer told me I had to see a customer service agent. As before, the agent phoned someone and read my name, birthdate, and drivers license number to the person on the other end. As before, I was permitted to board the plane. Will this happen every time? How do I get off the watchlist? The Department of Homeland Security will be getting an angry letter. Or fifty.

And so the sojurn continues. I will be leaving for CLE -- again -- in about two hours. I think the airline industry is the only industry in which you can be treated like crap and still be expected to pay full price. Any other industry would have given you a discount; at a restaurant, you would have gotten your meal for free or at a reduced price. If the airlines ran a restaurant, they'd routinely bring you the wrong food or spoiled food and demand that you pay full price. Then they'd kick you in the groin.

But if there's one lesson we can learn from this, it's this: don't fly United! They suck!