Doug Ross, a normal citizen like you and me, wrote a guest column for The Cincinnati Enquirer's "Your Voice" section on Friday. You know it's going to be good. (Link may expire after a week.) Aw, heck. Let me just post the entirety of his op-ed here:

Elections in Iraq spread freedom

In medicine, the consequences of failing to clean and dress a festering wound are clear: severe infection and even death may result. Prior to the war in the Middle East, Iraq was just such a festering wound.

It is safe to assume that certain observers among us, including recent writers in this space, believe that the world would be better off with Saddam Hussein, the terrorist training center at Salman Pak, Abu Abbas, Abu Nidal, al Qaida affiliate Ansar al Islam, a nuclear research program, Uday's rape rooms, hundreds of thousands of bodies in unmarked mass graves, anthrax, and tons of high explosives all co-existing in Iraq as the highly suspect UN sanctions machine ground to a halt.

It is increasingly clear that these observers are possessed of antediluvian ideas and low reserves of intellectual honesty. A little historical perspective is in order.

In 1776, there was exactly one country in the world with an elected government: the United States of America. Today there are 117 - or more than 60 percent of the world's governments.

Writer Joshua Muravchik points to "waves of democracy": periods of time in which the creation of elected governments accelerates, slows and then starts anew. Further, this tidal effect strengthens itself. As more democracies arise, remaining authoritarian governments find it increasingly difficult to retain power.

Only one region of the world has, thus far, been left behind: the Middle East and North Africa. Israel is the sole democracy among 18 states. The handiwork of George W. Bush is therefore astonishing: Afghanistan, the Palestinian Authority, and - within days - Iraq will all have held elections.

Further, Bush's leadership has heartened freedom-lovers and propelled the cause of liberty in Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Yemen and Oman, where elections have been or are slated to be held. And the enticing fragrance of freedom hasn't stopped at the ballot box.

Egypt's first independent newspaper launched in 2004. A new network called Democracy Television, owned by Arab liberals, is slated to begin broadcasting in May. Each month, influential Arab intellectuals issue new demands for reform.

Some caustic observers warn that democracy is no panacea for terrorism. But the historical record shows that democratic governments seldom sow either conflict or terror. These observers, therefore, must ignore both history and intellectual honesty, burying their heads in the sand while freedom marches on.

Doug Ross of Symmes Township is a software architect and developer specializing in Internet-based commerce and collaboration systems.

Mr. Ross deigns to give us a history lesson in order to explain why "it is safe to assume that certain observers among us, including recent writers in this space, believe that the world would be better off with Saddam Hussein." Okay, Doug. Teach away.

"In 1776, there was exactly one country in the world with an elected government: the United States of America." Really, Doug? By my calculations, there were no elected governments in 1776, since the United States did not exist until 1789! Once again, we have confused the Declaration of Independence -- a persuasive essay -- for the Constitution -- a legal document. But I suppose that's a public school education for you.

He then gives us a lesson in contemporary geo-politics. "Israel is the sole democracy among 18 states [in the Middle East]. The handiwork of George W. Bush is therefore astonishing: Afghanistan, the Palestinian Authority, and -- within days -- Iraq will have held elections." Not so fast there, Sunny Jim. What did George W. Bush have to do with elections in the Palestinian Authority? And let's talk about these elections in Iraq. Why is it so important to the Bush administration that the elections happen, even though there has been a guarantee of violence? Terrorists have published pamphlets declaring, "We vow to wash the streets of Baghdad with the voters' blood" and "To those of you who think you can vote and then run away, we will shadow you and catch you, and we will cut off your heads and the heads of your children." That's quite an incentive to vote. Mark my words: tomorrow's election will be a bloodbath.

Let's go back to that statement that Israel is the sole democracy in the Middle East. What happened to Turkey? Last I checked, Turkey was a secular democracy and it was one of our good friends. Was Gamal Abdal Nasser's overthrow of King Farouk all for naught? I suppose Egypt doesn't count as a democracy, either. Probably because it's not on our side (Egypt sided with the Soviet Union during the Cold War, though to his credit, Nasser observed that being allied with the Soviet Union was as bad as being allied with the United States). No doubt Venezuela under Hugo Chavez isn't a democracy, either. Please don't forget Lebanon or Yemen, as they are also democracies (actually, all of these countries are republics, but no one cares about terminology anymore).

So when you say "Israel is the sole democracy in the Middle East," you mean either 1) "Israel is the sole democracy in the Middle East that agrees with our policies," or 2) "There are five democracies in the Middle East." Bush has been pushing this line that "Israel is the sole democracy in the Middle East" for four years. Doesn't he know he's wrong? Don't his supporters do their homework?

And what is this "18 states" thing? Did Mr. Ross pick 18 states at random? By my count (and by the Columbia Encyclopedia's), there are 12 states in the Middle East: Turkey, Syria, Lebanon, Israel, Jordan, Iraq, Iran, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Yemen, Oman, and the United Arab Emirates. Where did the other six states come from?

"Bush's leadership has heartened freedom-lovers and propelled the cause of liberty in Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Yemen, and Oman, where elections have been or are slated to be held." Not so much. Egypt has been having elections since 1954, well before Bush's leadership heartened freedom-lovers there. Yemen's constitution dates from 1991, when Bush was still an unsuccessful entrepreneur. It's doubtful that even he, with his Christ-like powers, could have influenced Yemen back then.

So, in short, Mr. Doug Ross of Symmes Township has demonstrated that he knows nothing about the world except what he is told by the Bush administration. Perhaps if he visited the links above and learned a little bit about the Middle East, he would come to understand that the Bush administration lies where it is convenient, distorts the truth where it is convenient, and repeats incorrect facts to the point where people believe they are true (e.g. "Israel is the only democracy in the Middle East"). Iraq is not a safer place without Saddam Hussein; the world is not a safer place now that he has fallen from power. The world hates us more than it ever has. Specifically, Iraqis hate us more than they ever have. But it's nothing personal. Terrorist groups see a power vacuum and are vying for control of Iraq, which they think they can acheive because 1) they have more rocket-propelled grenades, and 2) the people don't want to be ruled by the United States.

I loathe the Bush administration.