DOVER, Penn. -- On the heels of a state decision to allow intelligent design into Pennsylvania public school biology classrooms, one school board has taken the extra step of allowing alchemy to be taught in chemistry classrooms.

Dr. Lester Cartwright of the Alternative Chemistry Institute, who spoke on behalf of alchemists, said the decision was a victory for academic freedom. "What we have out there right now are scientific elites who have been working very hard to keep alternative chemistry out of their professional journals, as well as university and high school classrooms. They have no basis for saying that our alternative forms of chemistry are wrong; they just say, 'You can't teach that here' and leave it at that."

Alternative chemistry, formerly known as alchemy, is the science of turning baser metals, like lead, into gold. It also deals with finding a chemical formula for an elixir of life, which would allow immortality. According to alchemists, the use of a "philosopher's stone" is required to acheive these goals, and as yet, no such substance has ever been found.

AC proponents, such as Dr. Cartwright, prefer the use of the term "alternative chemistry," since "alchemy" is a misleading and loaded phrase. "When you hear the word 'alchemy,' you think of men in long, white beards and pointy hats in the middle ages trying to do crazy stuff. That's not what we're about. Look, I don't even have a beard!"

Critics, like Dr. Chandra Gupta of Harvard University, disagree. "There is no rational, scientific basis for the study of alchemy. It has been proven time and again that there is no way to change one element into another element," she said, also pointing out that alchemy had been discredited as a science hundreds of years ago. "Elixir of life? There's no such thing, and teaching kids that it is possible is a waste of time and money, as well as disingenuous to science."

But Dr. Cartwright disagrees. "I'm very familiar with Dr. Gupta. She is one of my staunchest critics, and unforunately, she has been suckered in by the liberal scientific elite. If they're so sure that their methods are right, then why not teach kids both kinds of science and let them decide? All we're asking is the opportunity to teach the controversy."

Rufus Einhorn, author of the book My Date with Albertus Magnus, has studied the history of alchemy and modern chemistry. "There is no controversy within chemistry. AC proponents would like to frame it that way, so that a misguided audience thinks that there is some need to be objective, but no credible chemist actually believes in alchemy. The Law of Conservation is one of the benchmark theories of chemistry, and it precludes the ability to turn elements into other elements," he said. Einhorn also had some choice remarks about Dr. Cartwright. "That guy doesn't have a doctorate in chemistry or any other science. He has a Ph.D. in education from Patriot University, formerly a ministry of Hilltop Baptist Church in Colorado Springs."

Nevertheless, Dr. Cartwright was ultimately successful in convincing one school board in Pennsylvania that not teaching all sides of the issue was academically dishonest. "Lester Cartwright is a true American hero who has stood up to the liberal elite and not been taken down by them. Hopefully, we can spread the teaching of AC to every school board in the country," said David Horowitz, president of the group Students for Academic Freedom. "Our next challenge is the theory of relativity. See that word 'theory'? Yeah, it's going down. Nothing is relative -- not morality, and certainly not time. Everything is fixed, and we believe that students must be taught our viewpoint on the issue. That is the definition of academic freedom."